When you meet someone new, the process of becoming friends or romantic partners moves through three distinct stages.

Initially you’re curious about that person: What are they like? Do we have similar interests? Could we be good for each other? 

You then choose to spend time together for a while, maybe over coffee or lunches or hanging out, getting to know them and testing your hunches. 

At some point, you decide, “This is a person for me—we like and trust each other. We’re friends.”

Did you know every relationship with a customer moves through the same three stages? 

❓ Stage 1: Curiosity

How are you drawing your potential customer in? 

Tip: the only thing that makes a customer curious about you is if you have something that will help them survive and thrive.

💡 Stage 2: Enlightenment

After you’ve piqued a customer's curiosity, they want to learn more. When you enlighten your customers, you tell them HOW you can help them survive. Without this, a relationship will fizzle.

🤝 Stage 3: Commitment

A commitment translates to a purchase. Only after a customer has passed through stages 1 & 2 will they be willing to commit. Not before.

Here's the big takeaway: customers will only put their money on the line (commit!) after you've made them curious and enlightened them. 

And yet…

A lot of marketing campaigns ask for the commitment way too soon, and that leads to very few sales. If you ask for a commitment before the customer is ready, you come off as pushy and demanding. Take the time to go through all three stages instead.

As a business owner, how can you apply the three stages of relationship when you court your customers?

You can do it gradually over time with a marketing campaign. You can even do it on your website.

An Example: Muffler Shop

Let’s say your car needs a new muffler. 

The car’s been getting louder and the problem’s been gnawing at you and you haven’t taken time to get it fixed—but now it’s just too much. Your Dodge Caravan sounds like Dale Earnhardt’s #3 Chevy at Talladega. Even your neighbors are starting to stare when you leave and pull into your driveway. 

You Google “muffler shops near me”—what do you find?

❓ Stage 1: Curiosity

At this stage your main question is, Can you help me survive and thrive? You have a problem and you need to know if someone can solve it.

In short, they need to get your attention. Curiosity will do that.

You look at the websites of the muffler shops near you and most of them say something like:

Welcome to [Muffler Shop Name]
Our certified technicians are here to serve all your auto care needs
Top quality repairs with top quality parts

The national chains list coupons or specials.

Meh.

But the website header for one shop says this:

No one wants a noisy car
One-Hour Muffler Experts
Done fast - Done right - Guaranteed

Now you’re curious, you’re intrigued. Why? 

Because One-Hour Muffler Experts quickly shows it understands your problem: the embarrassment of a noisy car. And you’ve been too busy to schedule an appointment so one hour sounds perfect.

One-Hour Muffler Experts might help you survive and thrive.

💡 Stage 2: Enlightenment

One-Hour Muffler Experts got your attention. Now they need to show you HOW they’ll solve your problem and make your life better.

You scroll down their homepage and learn about their business and process:

• You won’t have to wait to schedule an appointment - They have a huge inventory which means your car’s new muffler is already in the shop. 

• You’ll be in and out in an hour - They only do mufflers and they’ve perfected an extremely efficient installation system—99% of repairs are done in under 50 minutes.

• Your repair is guaranteed - They offer a 5-year warranty on the muffler, parts, and labor. 

Then they show you a simple three-step plan to solving your problem:

1. Book an appointment

2. Get your muffler fixed in an hour

3. Enjoy driving in peace and quiet again 

Importantly, the page is written with a deep sense of empathy. What does the customer care about? What are their concerns? How do the details affect them? 

Now you’re enlightened: you feel confident One-Hour Muffler Experts can solve your noisy car problem (and the embarrassment it’s causing you). You’re ready to take the next step.

🤝 Stage 3: Commitment

One-Hour Muffler Experts has done a fantastic job of piquing your curiosity. They've shown you they understand your problem and they've explained how they can solve your problem.

Now it’s time to make it easy to seal the deal.

In the upper right corner of the homepage and in several places further down, you see a big blue button:

Book an appointment

You click that button and you're taken to an online form where you can schedule your appointment.

One-Hour Muffler Experts knows some people like to call. So they list their phone number as well.

You didn’t have to hunt to find a way to buy. They made it easy for you.

Apply the Three Stages in Your Business

You can apply the three stages of relationship—curiosity, enlightenment, commitment—on your website like this example. 

For more complex or expensive offerings, you may need to be on someone’s radar for a long time before they’re ready to buy. A sales funnel with a nurture email campaign is a great tool for building long-term, trusting relationships. Social media and offline campaigns can be effective, too.

If you’re ready to start building relationships with your website and marketing, I can coach you through it. Or if you’re too busy, I can do it for you. 

Schedule a call today and let’s talk about courting your customer.

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